


Stay

by ameerkatofficial



Series: To The Moon and Back [2]
Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Almost Kiss, Almost Sex, Apologies, Awkward Boners, Awkward Conversations, Awkwardness, Canon Queer Character, Canon Queer Character of Color, Canon Queer Relationship, Dom Peter Nureyev, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Exes, Fluff and Angst, Heart-to-Heart, Hurt Juno Steel, Hurt/Comfort, Juno Steel Needs a Hug, Juno Steel Tries, Juno Steel is in Love, Nonbinary Juno Steel, Other, Queer Themes, Reunions, Sad Peter Nureyev, Sex Jokes, Spoilers, Sub Juno Steel, Talking, Tears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:15:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23647573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ameerkatofficial/pseuds/ameerkatofficial
Summary: S3E2 Juno Steel and the Man in the Glass. Takes place right at the end of the episode, and then continues on afterward...
Relationships: Peter Nureyev & Juno Steel, Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Series: To The Moon and Back [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1751119
Comments: 7
Kudos: 99





	Stay

**Author's Note:**

> Ah this hurt to write...left behind some folks after the coronavirus forced us to flee our university...and this is some stuff I wish I could have said...
> 
> Eh, doesn't matter. It's 6 in the morning and you came here for fanfiction, didn't you? Go ahead and read...
> 
> EDIT: God so maybe grammar mistakes...remind me to never publish at 6 in the morning...

He was sweating despite the cool air of the ship. It ran down his chest and made his nightshirt stick to himself, right in the middle where his heart was beating quickly, but slowing, slowing, _slower..._

But his mind was rushing as his heart slowed, rushing with tales of a fantastic myth that this woman, dear Captain Aurinko, had just put into his head as truth. He didn't believe it, of course, but his pulse told him otherwise, that perhaps somewhere deep down he still had the fanciful dreams of a boy with a home and warmth and laughter that meant a damn. And then the warmth was gone, for so many years, like a candle burnt out, with perhaps little smolderings in between. Until warmth came again in a flickering smile and soft eyes and a hard soul and heavy footfalls that trampled upon a thief's heart not too terribly long ago--

He could hear them now...

He could hear them _now!_

_Tap-tap-tap..._

_"...yes, come in, come in."_

The words were quick and slurred, barely having enough puffs of air to leave his lips as he regretted breathing life into them the moment they escaped. He half hoped the Juno wouldn't catch them, but the other half won, and a door creaked, and a voice creaked in harmony, soft and awkward as his smile must have been. 

"Hey there... _Ransom_..."

Ransom sat up in his bed, feeling the sheets stick to the bare and sticky small of his back, urging him to just fall back and let the other leave already! But he straightened himself up despite himself, and greeted the other with a sharp smile that bit back the tears shed one morning on Mars. His eyes shaded down to a salacious mask, something roving and risqué.

"Oh, just close the door and drop the silly moniker," the thief laughed, speaking quickly, "I already regret choosing it."

He heard lips open, letting a sigh depart them as the other clung to the door like some scolded child, chest pressed against the smooth edge of the door. He looked like he was sweating too, and he _was._

"Okay. Peter, then--"

"And not that, either," the thief rose from his bed, stepping lively toward the frightened animal cornered at the door, "Everyone who's ever called me _Peter_ has wanted to be my parent--even if I've only let a few fit the role..." but as he came closer, his steps slowed to a stop, and the perverse mask he wore fell to the floor as his gaze shot up from Juno's soft lips to his soft eye. The thief's sharp teeth disappeared into a light frown. "So please," he cleared his throat, "Just call me what you used to."

"Okay." 

Juno's lips twinged. He quickly slid into the room and shut the door, his back pressing against it as it swung closed. 

And then there was a pause as the thief wordlessly asked the other's purpose for a nighttime visit to his bedroom, and Juno wordlessly stammered and stuttered and struggled for an answer, wordlessly twisting his tongue in knots.

"So... _Nureyev_ ," he spoke as if he just ran a marathon, but paused to taste the consonants of that precious name he took from the thief-- _always the indulgent one when given the chance_. "I've been thinking that we should probably--um-- _talk_ \--about-- _us--_ "

_"--so have I--"_

"--I know you don't want to, but--wait. _What?"_

The metaphorical _cat_ was out of the _bag_ it seemed. And, as usual, Juno thought he was the only person in the room making an effort to be the bigger person. And perhaps he was right. 

"I think we should talk, too," Nureyev grinned once again, but kept his lips closed. He backed off of Juno and paced deeper into his room. "But if you keep standing there while you do it you're going to make me terribly nervous. Please," he swiped a delicate hand across the sheets, smoothing out the wrinkles in one easy swipe, " _sit._ "

Juno caught sight of Nureyev's hands with his one eye, and Nureyev caught sight of Juno staring at them, and they both knew this in a breath and a glance, but felt it best to not remark upon it until further notice. 

"Cool. Thanks. _Nureyev._ " Juno rushed forward, at first with a bold purposefulness, then trepidation, then the outright bashfulness of a teenager upon the doorstep of his lover's family home as he sank surprisingly gently into the sheets beside Nureyev. He spent some time speaking quickly, breathlessly, as if he had only one breath to spare and felt the need to get out all of his thoughts upon it, all the while refusing to look the other in the eyes. "Listen. I just...wanted to say I’m sorry. The last time we saw each other, that night...I messed up. I don’t know if that hurt, or how much it hurt, but that doesn’t matter--I shouldn’t’ve just walked out. And..." Juno saw Peter's sharp teeth through parted lips, smelled that cologne and got choked up, wanting to fall in embrace and weep or sigh or scream. But then he saw Peter's dark, twinkling eyes like stolen bits of outer space, and he gulped down, knowing in his heart of hearts that if he didn't continue he never would. "And I did it 'cause I was scared, alright? Scared of...what was going on, what was happening between us, between you and me. I--I like you a lot, and I thought it was just the _sex_ that was great but I mean I trashed my apartment and drank myself into a near-coma after you left that first night and I don't think even the best sex in the universe could do that to somebody--"

"It was good sex..."

" _Yeah, it was._ Shut up," Juno chuckled hoarsely, his voice nasally and pinched off. He was sniffling again. He'd rehearsed this apology so many times in his head and yet it was falling apart because he couldn't stop crying and Nureyev couldn't stop being fresh. Juno took a shallow, rattling breath for fear that he might throw up. "A-Anyway...I like you, like...a lot, _Nureyev_. Like a _lot._ We've been through...through torture together. Through two cases and our lives on the line and _Miasma_ and I almost-- _killed_ myself for you...but you telling me that you were falling for me just made that feeling too, uh, _real?_ And not only do I like you 'cause I mean _I like a lot of people,_ Nureyev but I don't...trust them...not more than like...four people I think? A-And one of them's dead anyway so I guess that's uh... _three_...anyway I _trust_ you, Nureyev, and that's--scary..." Juno took a breath at last, and Nureyev realized he had been holding his breath along with Juno. "I trust you. _I trust you_. And that's scarier to me than even... _leaving Hyperion City..._ So I'm sorry, Nureyev, for leaving you without even a note explaining why. "

Juno fell silent. The spaceship hummed on. 

After a few moments of awkward finger-tapping and twists of the ex-detective's feet, Nureyev realized that it was likely his turn to speak now, as no one else was speaking anymore. But he couldn't find words. He had many but none he felt fit to say aloud. _You're stupid. You're reckless. You're a child. I love you._

Nureyev instead chose actions over words. He shoved Juno down with one, lithe arm, before clambering on top, pinning him down by his shoulders, knees between knees, pressed into the mattress. Juno hiccuped as he fell, twitching as Nureyev settled on top of him, making some soft, high sound between a sigh and a sob. But Nureyev did nothing more than stare at this point, stare down at man beneath him, whimpering like a wounded animal. But the hastened breathing and hiccups and mewls stopped into a hush when Nureyev touched Juno's face, fingers running down from thick lips to his collarbone, then further down to swirl his thumb over the fabric that separated him from Juno's chest. 

Juno kept watch on Nureyev's gaze all the while, his throat rolling down his neck along with beads of sweat. The gaze was hard, unyielding as the grip Nureyev had on his shoulders. Juno felt himself flush, up and down and all over. He was embarrassed to admit how often he thought about how much he liked Nureyev's weight on him, and this was nearly enough to shoot him to the moon. 

Then Nureyev pulled his hand away, and fell onto the other, His chin nestled into the other's shoulder. He was received by quick arms that wrapped around his waist. Juno was sweating.

" _I'm sorry too,_ " Nureyev sighed out, "I'm sorry I rushed things. I'm sorry I didn't let you heal first, didn't give you any real choice in the moment. But...we had finally escaped, and I had nearly _lost you_ , and..." he combed his fingers through Juno's thick hair, _"I never wanted to lose you again..."_

"And then you lost me again"

Juno felt Nureyev's jaw clench against his shoulder.

"Yes, exactly. And then I lost you again."

There was a hum between the both of them.

"I want you to stay here, Juno. Only if you'd _like..."_

_"Is that why you got me trapped under you like this?"_

Nureyev chuckled, breathing in the scent of Juno's sweat, the heat of laser fire and the smell of dinner and aftershave, " _Mmm..._ I can already _feel_ how much you're liking me laying on top of you like this--"

_"Shut up."_

Nureyev almost retorted with _"make me",_ but found himself too content here to speak, suspended in a moment with Juno's heat. Never before did he more desire to crawl into a sliver of time, curl up and nap in it, live in it. 

_"I'll stay, okay?"_ Juno replied at last, his voice in an exasperated huff, though he made no move to leave, instead squeezing the other tighter. Nureyev wanted to ask if he meant to stay the night or stay in his life. 

Surely he'd get his answer in the morning...

**Author's Note:**

> Yep.


End file.
